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Isolation

I really do not like talking about this topic.

It is not because isolation is a deep subject that can be saddening, but it is mainly because to me it does not deliver any awareness or impactful message when there are words being typed about the topic. Like to let pictures and motion pictures tell it like it is; Let the audience think. That's the way I enjoy doing things when it comes to my work. Let the audience think. I enjoy the idea of interacting with my audience in different ways. Whether in books, video, keynote events, and so on. Never really enjoyed demanding others to think a certain way. That'll make the world boring.

To think a certain way. Seems like the foundation of my isolation. Everyone's got their reasons to be isolated; I have mine. It is a light and dark situation to me. I hate it, and I love it. During school, I much would rather have that kind of isolation because then I wouldn't unintentionally irritate anyone; Much rather do things in private and then send them out from my cave. Other than homework, track, and other fun activities I would do at school, the thing I most oftentimes would do was to write. Oftentimes under a tree, by a rock, or just wherever I can sit comfortably. Write whatever came to mind. Fiction, non fiction, sometimes doodle a little, but a lot of it was just writing stories. If there is one thing I have learned from watching movies repeatedly is that they never change. The same place, the same plot, the same characters. Wanted to branch out and make my own worlds and take a break from visiting other worlds. Find my own realities, find my own stories.

Never really shared any of them yet, to me, it would be too confusing for the readers. I could be wrong though, but they're just not ready to be shared at the moment yet. Being in isolation is good for me. Helps me think, keep focus, and stay in control. I saw a journalist on TV about the lack of internet and how many would not get bored with it around. On the TV, people can be bored without the internet, and it came up with a fascinating conclusion. Boredom leads to creativity; I do not think anyone would want to be with me when I'm isolated, it is boring. Of course, I enjoy the fun things like pinball, card games, and sports; But a lot of times I prefer to be myself; Have my own adventures with me. I isolate myself not just to avoid any future embarrassments with other people, but most of it has been to find my own identity.

Graduated, wrote a book, own a company, working on the second book, travel and speak, and all sorts of things; But I still would try to figure out who I am. Who am I? What's my purpose? When I'm not working, I would do some video projects on my spare time on the Tyler McNamer channel. Doesn't have a specific theme. I just share whatever came to mind and feel like sharing. No real reason why I would do those videos. No fame, no money, or anything like that. Just wanted to share.

Does tend to feel isolating at times when I'm working. There are a lot of emails from my dear readers, and I love them all; Only thing I wish I could do more often is see my readers in person. Readers for my book and viewers for my channel. But many would enjoy the mystery anyway; That's why I don't like talking about the whole isolation thing. Ruins the mystery. But I'll still talk about the topic to help out on why many with autism would want isolation. Many times it would be to

  • Figure themselves out
  • Figure others out
  • Figure the world out
  • Avoiding contact to avoid embarrassment
  • Discover creativity
  • Improve creativity
  • Wanting to learn things on their own
  • Wanting to escape

Always a time to escape and a time to return. Got to have that balance in my opinion. Still in escape mode, eventually, the person will get lost. Not going to lie when I say I have been lost so many times. Finding a place feels good, feels like I am wanted, not needed. Wrote my first book in isolation and I did the same with the second. Didn't really expect the first book to gain so much attention. Don't feel so alone much anymore. Feels nice; but I do like to go back and do something creative that may be worth the good share online and off. Even after the things I have shared and have done, it does still feel like an adventure trying to figure myself out. Sounds extremely selfish, but that is why I do it in isolation and why I do not enjoy talking about it with others. But I still will when people ask me. I answer all questions easy and hard.

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