Popular to Me: Choosing What You Truly Like
Hello AutismWorks Community,
When people talk about “what’s popular,” they usually mean what most people are watching, playing, or listening to. I look at it differently. I think about what’s popular to me. A lot of what I enjoy—music, video games, TV, movies—is off the radar. Still, it matters to me, so it’s popular in my world.
This article is a reminder that you don’t have to like something just because everyone else does. Chasing trends to fit in can chip away at identity and personality. Finding what you genuinely like is healthier—and more fun.
Popularity, Reframed
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Public popular: Charts, top 10 lists, viral hits.
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Personal popular: The things that light you up, even if few people know them.
Both can be great. I’m not against mainstream favorites. If you love something big and famous, that’s fine. I just want to make room for the quiet gems that aren’t everywhere—but still feel like home.
Why Pressure to “Fit In” Backfires
I’ve seen people, especially those who want acceptance, force themselves to like what’s trending. That pressure:
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Hides the real self to avoid judgment
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Creates exhaustion from pretending
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Blocks discovery of personal interests that build confidence
Fitting in is temporary. Knowing yourself lasts longer.
How I Choose What’s “Popular to Me”
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Follow curiosity, not crowds. If a sound, story, or style pulls me in, I follow it—no explanation needed.
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Use a small “favorites list.” I keep a short list of music, games, and shows that always feel good. That’s my personal “top chart.”
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Sample without commitment. I try a few minutes, a single, or one episode. If it clicks, I keep going. If not, I move on—no guilt.
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Return to comfort picks. Rewatching or replaying isn’t “stuck”—it’s knowing what works for me.
If You Like Mainstream Hits
Enjoy them. There’s nothing wrong with loving what most people love. The key is choosing it because you like it—not because you’re afraid of standing out.
Quick test: Would I still like this if no one else talked about it? If yes, keep it. If no, keep exploring.
Guardrails Against Popularity Pressure
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One honest sentence: “It’s not my thing, but I’m happy you enjoy it.”
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Swap invitations: “I’ll try your favorite; want to try mine next?”
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Personal rule: I don’t rate my taste by how many people agree with it.
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Energy check: After doing the “popular thing,” do I feel more me—or less me?
Notes for Parents, Teachers, and Friends
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Affirm individuality: “It’s okay to like something different.”
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Ask better questions: “What do you like about it?” (not “Why don’t you like what everyone else likes?”)
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Model variety: Share your own lesser-known favorites to normalize unique tastes.
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Praise ownership: Celebrate when someone chooses based on preference, not pressure.
Popularity isn’t only a public scoreboard. It can be personal—built from the songs, stories, and worlds that make sense to you. Whether your favorites are mainstream or hidden gems, choose them because they feel right. Keep your identity intact. Let your personality lead.
What’s popular to you is enough.
With respect,
Tyler McNamer
Founder, AutismWorks
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